The Bristol Stool Formation Scale

I just love this. It sounds like a Formation Dance Groups, music sheet.
It reads;

Type 1 Separate hard lumps like nuts (Hard to pass) (Hell!)

Type 2 Sausage shape a bit lumpy

Type 3 Like a sausage but with cracks on the surface (Ive gone off bangers!)

Type 4 Like a sausage or snake, smooth and soft

Type 5 Soft blobs with clear-cut edges (Passed easily)

Type 6 Fluffy pieces with ragged edges, a mussy stool

Type 7 Watery, no solid pieces ENTIRELY LIQUID

Who was the poor bugger who was given this task of cataloguing this in the first place, he deserves a medal.